Friday, August 11, 2017

Life is Complicated


While everyone else is up in arms about what Trump is doing I’m over here thinking about the complexities of life. The ones that make us human not machines.  I’ve had a few conversations recently with friends of my generation who have shared this sentiment, “I thought life was supposed to get easier as we get older”.  Unfortunately it’s not, and this is where I have to remind myself life is complicated.  Otherwise I’d be shouting that line from the movie Empire Records, “Damn the man!”

I feel all of us at some point feel trumped down in life or by life at times. So I’ve come up with some “Damn the man!” reminders.

1-Be kind. Remind yourself, life is complicated.  A friend recently posted this quote, “Be kind, you don’t know what someone else is going through.” This is so true.  So be kind, lend a ear, sometimes we need compassion. Also be kind to yourself.

2- Love nature. I can’t emphasize this one enough. Go for a walk, put your feet in the sand, and embrace the world around you.  As Ralph Waldo Emerson once said, “Live in the ocean, swim in the sea, drink the wild air”.

3- Savor time.  Savor every second like it is the finest morsel of food you have ever devoured. Time can be like a boiling pot of water. If you are waiting for something to come time seems to slow down, but when you are truly living it just flies by…my where has the time gone.

4- Be honest.  Be true with yourself accept your flaws alongside your strengths. No one is perfect, and there is always someone that can do it better. You are your own worst critic.

5-Forgive. Remember we are all on a journey, each with its’ own obstacles. Emerson also once said, “ Life is a journey, not a destination”. The obstacles or road bumps along our journey are what shape and mold us.  The obstacles help us grow not just as individuals, but also as humanity.

Life is very complicated, so garden your relationships. Why? Relationships are something all of us have, but they can be very complex. Sure some relationships are easy, but the good ones, the ones who are with you for a lifetime, those are the complex ones. The ones you fight for and cherish in a way that cannot be defined in words.  This dawned on me as I watched an interview with Jada Pinkett Smith on her relationship with Tupac. She described their relationship as, “It was beyond friendship…the type of relationship we had you only get once in a lifetime”. To help each other in our journeys we must learn to accept the complicated obstacles and help one another for the betterment of all humanity.

“Do not go where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path and leave a trail”- Ralph Waldo Emerson


Friday, June 23, 2017



Summer “Schooling”

So every year as the school year comes to an end, many of us find ourselves counting down until summer break, but have you ever caught yourself complaining?  Now there are several things we might find ourselves complaining about, for instance, “Why is it that as soon as summer break hits my kids have no problem waking up at the crack of dawn?” Or, how about your teacher friend saying, “I really am thankful the school year is over, but I need routine!” As a teacher as I started my first day of summer break, I decided that it was going to start with routine. And that this routine was going to maximize my son waking at the “crack of dawn.” So I was bound and determined to start of my summer break doing something that I longed to do, something that I needed to do, and something my son would benefit from, and that was starting our day with a walk in nature.

Now you might ask why?  Why was walking in nature so important?  Well for starters I wouldn’t be writing this right now, my walk from this morning brought fresh ideas to my head and I needed to pen them down.  So here I am sharing what I think is so vital to educators, teachers, and parents.   Some may think this is just for parents, but those are not the only ones that are affected by this.  You see on my walk this morning, I quickly realized as a teacher and a mother that summer is not a break for us to stop learning.  Believe it or not, my six-year-old son shared with me his thoughts about the book, The Giving Tree.  We were near the end of our walk at the time this conversation started, but he said to me, “Mom, that story isn’t real, that tree it doesn’t exist does it?” And I responded, “Well, it is a story, so it is fake, it is to help teach us a lesson about nature and life”. He said, “Yes, but mom it isn’t real, it didn’t happen”.  I explained to him, that it is fiction, and he said, “But fiction is real, and it’s not.” And I replied, “Fiction is fake, non-fiction is real”.  And it was at that moment that I realized just how amazing this walk had been not only for me, but also for him.  Here I am a 10th grade English Language Arts teacher, who teaches the differences between fiction and non-fiction all year long.  And yet, here my six-year-old son is having this philosophical conversation about these differences with Shel Silverstein’s The Giving Tree.  Now, some of you might be thinking, but you are an English teacher of course you will talk to your child like this.  And I must say that as a teacher and parent, we long to be able to talk to our kids this way, but the reality is that the opportunity has to arise.  How can such an opportunity arise if nothing is there to engage it?  And hence, this is why we must rethink and redefine our summer break to summer “schooling”.  We must not let our children have a break from learning.

You see it came to me during this walk, that we must break the stigma that we have tied to “summer school”.  By creating this stigma that “summer school” is a bad thing, we have also taught them that summer is a “break” from learning.  Now some of you are saying, but they need the break and they still get socialized learning.  And I would agree with you; however, children must also see summer as “schooling”.  What I mean by this is that there is just as much for children to learn in the summer as there is throughout the traditional school year.  I decided months ago that my son was not getting the summer off from school.  And I have taken some heat from others about it.  What do I say in my defense, “That he needs to continue to practice what he has learned, so that he doesn’t revert at all”.  However, I realized this morning, that it is not simply maintaining the skills he has learned, but also continuing his education.

Truthfully, this discovery did not just occur out of the blue on this first morning walk of the summer with my son.  I had actually been thinking about this for some time, I knew I needed to map out a routine for summer.  I remembered how helpful nature walks were in the past, they allowed me time to clear my head, sort my thoughts, and the most beneficial part to them was how much inspiration they gave me.  Ah-ha! Yes, you see the reason I am writing this now, is because it was all inspired by my walk this morning.  As several teachers gathered together on the last day to celebrate another year in the books, some of us talked about going on hikes a few times a week.  And I thought to myself, why wait to do it just a few times, this needs to be a daily routine.  And I know some of you are already thinking, but it is so hot in the summer and I hate being hot.  Okay, but remember you must be the example to your student and that means even as a parent, your child is also your student!


The walk we took this morning was 2 miles or two loops. Throughout the walk I explained to my son that we would walk the two loops and afterwards he could play in the playground at the park.  I kept reminding him that in order to “Play hard” we must “work hard”.  So if we were able to make our two laps then he could play in the playground.  Now, here is the teacher as parent part, when you promise your child something, be sure to remind him of the limits.  So, as we finished the last loop, I said, “Okay, now we can go to the playground, but before we enter, remember that you only have 15 minutes, so when we enter the playground I will check the time and count down from there”.  So as my son played and played, I kept checking in with him reminding him you have ten minutes, 7 minutes, 3 minutes.  And some of you may ask, why is she sharing this, well it is always important to establish rules and keep to them.  It is also critical to check in with children and give them reminders. You might be really surprised to discover you will have less meltdown.

So I hope you enjoy your summer and all the discoveries you will encounter along the way!